Can we talk about something lighter?

The last few days have been a bit heavy on the soul searching.  That happens when you spend time inside your own head.  Try it sometime, just don’t scare yourself.  I found some areas of my brain with cobwebs so thick you would have thought we were in my grandma’s attic.  I’m not heading in until this afternoon today which gives me sometime in the morning, between wiping kid’s faces and making sure they aren’t getting too dirty to deal with something I’ve been avoiding: getting a new car.

I currently drive a very cool, Jeep Cherokee Sport.  It’s a 2001 which is the final year they made that model before moving on to the Jeep Liberty, Patriot; Compass lines that I guess make us feel more Anglo American, less Native American.  Of course, that’s just a quick opinion.  Anyway, I’ve come to the realization that I may have to get a mini-van.  Yep, take your jaw off the floor, it’s true.  I’m a family man after all, isn’t that the next step?  The fact that I’ve avoided it this long is probably something commendable I’m hoping.  Plus, it will better justify my purchase of some sporty two seat BMW when I hit my midlife crisis in a few years.  Of course, being a sensible person, I had to make a list of pro’s and con’s to getting a mini-van. 

Pro’s:  space (you can seat seven, have captain’s chairs for the kids which means they can sit next to each other in their own seats plus the seats come out to load drum equipment, bicycles, rocket launchers, etc), remote doors (opening the sliding doors and tailgate has to be a good thing right? Especially if you can catch someone standing behind your car a bit to close), smooth ride (let’s face it, the Jeep Cherokee sport wasn’t exactly built for cruising down the highway for hours on end at 75 MPH), add ons (I’m sure I could spring for the DVD players, heated seats, pleather or leather like substance, self cleaning, self washing, automatic driving, etc. that these things must come with now right?)

Con’s:  IT’S A MINI-VAN (toss the years of cool out the window that you have built by being in a band and the sideburns aren’t going to help since they decent from a scalp that is gradually getting more and more bald, your only hope is to get tinted windows and put on a few stickers that say things like “my other car is a Harley” or “my dog is my copilot”)

Guess I’m off to get my argyle sweater vest, some penny loafers, dad jeans and a mini-van.  It’s a sad day indeed.

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2 Responses to “Can we talk about something lighter?”

  1. Matt N Says:

    Aaron, to have managed this long without a minivan, is impressive. But, yes, your coolness factor just dropped exponentially. Sorry. But, your functionality just improved 10fold.

    so, before you hop into your new Minivan, google the youtube sensation ‘Swagger Wagon’ and make yourself feel better.

    Been there, done that.

  2. Jen Says:

    Aaron,
    This is HILARIOUS!!! I was laughing at the computer. Maybe you can borrow some “people” sweater vest. You HAVE to keep the core warm 😉 Can’t wait to see the BMW! We can race 🙂

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