Press release: Aaron Hunt admits to food addiction

Rochester, NY-  As rumors continued to swirl, Aaron Hunt announced today that he does indeed suffer from a food addiction.  “I’ve really had this problem all my life.”  He read in a prepared statement.  “Since I was born, I’ve had a need to consume food.  I guess it just seemed natural.  The past few years, I’ve been hiding this addiction, hoping I could conquer it.  I feel like I have let my family, fans and my sponsors down by not conquering this addiction and I hope that we can all get past this.  Especially my sponsors.”

Critics of Aaron claim he is only now admitting to this issue because recently several people have come forward claiming he frequented their establishments to sample their wares.  “He was here at least twice a week in the morning,” stated a manager at the Bagel Bin in Brighton, “same thing every time, two blueberry bagels.  Sometimes he’d get a large coffee.  I suspect that is on a day he didn’t have time to brew it at home.  The sad thing is, sometimes he’d bring his kids and buy them bagels too.  It’s just sad to see someone passing their addictions on to their children.  By the way, did you want the strawberry cream cheese?”

“Oh, he’d be in here every Saturday morning with his kids, buying all kinds of food,” stated a Wegmans cashier.  “I couldn’t believe the amount of organic products that he’d pile into that cart, and he’d never buy those cute kids candy.  I mean, if you’re going to expose them to food, go all the way right?  Do you want paper or plastic?”

“We take credit for being the first place to go to the press,” stated a Mise en Place employee who wishes to remain anonymous.  “For a while he was here once a week picking up two dinners and a few sides.  Occasionally he’d even buy some of those flat pretzels or select from our wide variety of beers in the coolers over there.  I’d recommend the Ithaca Flower Power IPA.  Now we only see him every other week.  Maybe he’s turned a corner.  I know you look at us as bad people for supporting his habit, but hey, a girl’s got to eat.  Wait, that didn’t sound right.  Don’t quote me on that.”

Mr. Hunt has yet to schedule a visit with an eating specialist, but that didn’t stop us from asking a few celebrity doctors for their opinions.  “It’s an addiction, he needs to be strong, own up to it and take care of his family,” stated Dr. Phil.  “Now please turn that recorder off so I can finish my lunch.”  Dr. Drew also chimed in.  “I know my specialty is sexual addiction, but I just love being on the record so much, I wanted to give you my opinion.  What was the topic again?”

“Please let everyone know that I will kick this addiction and be better than ever,” Mr. Hunt stated to close out a telephone interview.  “My family is in shock at the moment.  They thought everything was just fine and that I was really a normal person.  I would simply ask that you respect our privacy.  All further questions can be handled through my PR team.  Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m hungry.”


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